Only Human

jason sadler’s Story

So, long story short...

While jason sadler was Going on a date

jason sadler made the mistake of

not aborting the date early

My Advice to You is

if things get weird and you have an out, take it, don't go to the movie after dinner, go for ice cream or go back to your/her place

Here's the whole story

I was on a date with a woman, and I say woman because she was 30, and here is the chain of events to lead to one of my weirdest dates ever:

I pick her up from her place and she offers to show me around, which was where I should have noticed some hints. We walked around her place and when we got to her room, she said something to the effect of "maybe I can show you this again later.." How did I not pay attention to this from the get-go? She was pretty easy on the eyes and seemed to have a great personality so I was probably thinking with the wrong part of my anatomy.
We go to a nice dinner and about half way through she starts rubbing my leg with her foot. Initially I thought my leg was inadvertently touching the pole under the booth, but the pole can't get your inner thigh.
She INSISTS on paying for dinner. For those of you that know me, you know I am stubborn and always pay for dinner. I couldn't win this battle, no matter what. She kept saying "I asked you out, I chose this place etc."
A lot of questions arose about my future, her future, thinking about children, how many I wanted, what their names would be, my sexual past, her past.... It started to get uncomfortable, but she was still pretty attractive and my lower anatomy had a strong grip on my decision making skills.
At this point it would have been wise to say "no thank you" to the suggested movie and just go home.
We go to a movie, I pay finally, she has no student ID and actually gives me shit for using mine, although I was a student at the time. She makes some comment like "I hope I can see your student ID later," or something insanely cheesy.
Let's just say I couldn't watch much of Tom Cruise and his antics in MI-3, although I really wanted to, there was talking and groping going on that was not consented. Some of you may think that I am not of heterosexual decent at this point, but it was just getting weird, there were noises being made that I wasn't having any part in promoting, other people ARE in the theater etc...
I am driving her home, lots of conversation about where we see ourselves in a couple years, more children talk etc. I have a stunning realization, her biological clock is ticking and I am her prey. How could I become the prey?? She is attacking me while I am driving, I finally get to her house and she runs out of the car to her door and is waving at me to come in. Where am I? What planet is the woman from?

It was at this point I got out of the car (WHY??) and I think I can just say goodnight, maybe a kiss on the cheek and we'll see you later. No. Somehow I did stay strong and didn't end up in her aforementioned bedroom, but she has now started crying!! Honestly, I couldn't make this up, this is actually happening. I calm her down (because I am a NICE guy) and she says she is tired and is going to bed, I can let myself out and upstairs she went.

At this point I ran to my car, drove 120mph home and was extremely confused for the rest of the night.

I have never seen this woman again! She worked out at the YMCA at the exact time I did for at least 3 months prior to this. Not once have I ever seen her or heard from her (we emailed a few times).

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Comments (7)

Chris Graff says

Posted on February 17, 2007

sounds like the date should have been aborted about 30.5 years ago HI-YO!

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I read 'em, I weep says

Posted on February 19, 2007

Until she started crying, it doesn't sound like anything was really odd about your date. What's wrong with talking about yourself? What's wrong with her being sexually forward? What's wrong with her paying (that one is really outdated, my friend)? I can't tell how old you are/were on this date, but I'm guessing not 30. In fact, I'm guessing barely 20. See, the thing is, maybe she was just ADULT and comfortable with herself. For pretty much every woman I know who even made an issue of it, the biological clock was not winding down at 30. And for most men I know, by 30 they were not afraid to talk about children (even if they didn't want any).

Someday you too will be 30. Perhaps then, when the 21-year-old co-eds you will inevitably try to hit on at 2-for-1 wing night think you're creepy and old, you'll look back and laugh at what a child you were when you dated that 30-year-old.

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